Hands Off ... the Toothbrush?
by Jennamajig

SUMMARY: Just a toothbrush, right?
SEASON/SPOILERS: None.
WARNINGS: Has a tiny bit of sex, but nothing major.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This hid on my hard drive for some time. It was the first slash story I completed, but not the first one to see the light of the web.

DISCLAIMER: The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.

The night started out great.

Get back from another mission, sit through another physical and another debriefing, tune out Carter's science babble, stay good night to Teal'c, have argument with Daniel over whose place to stay at, win argument, then drive home and have amazing sex with the aforementioned archeologist.

A nice normal night.

After said amazing sex, it was time to begin the rest of the regular night time routine, which on this particular night involved Daniel's squabble with my VCR, which apparently failed to record a Discovery Channel special on Mayan culture.

As amusing as it is to see one blue-eyed linguist wrestle with the one piece of technology he'll never beat, I head for the bathroom. It's still early. A date with my toothbrush and then I'll see if I can put a frustrated Danny's passion to good use in round two. Enter the bathroom and ...

That's where I saw it.

My toothbrush.

Out on the counter, dripping from recent use.

Daniel had used my toothbrush.

My nice normal night just got shot to hell.

I'm not anal. Really I'm not. My house is not completely clean half the time, and the laundry is never finished. I'm not what some would call your typical military man who has hospital corners and dust-free countertops. I have dust. Everywhere. Just ask Daniel who constantly sneezes whenever he gets near my undusted mantle.

Daniel.

Toothbrush.

For crying out loud, it's my toothbrush. You have to draw a line. Couples can share lots of things. Sarah and I did. Share a towel, share a coffee mug. But never did we ever share a toothbrush. I figure that particular pet peeve must stem back to the horrible film my fifth grade teacher forced the entire class to watch on tooth care. You don't know what lives on someone's toothbrush.

In the living room, I hear Daniel muttering in a language that certainly isn't English and know he's reached the end of his fight with the VCR for the evening. A minute later and I hear footsteps head toward the bedroom.

"Jack?"

I glance down at the toothbrush. Time for a chat with the linguist.

Daniel peers into the bathroom and finds me staring down at the toothbrush, still in the same place where Daniel left it, dripping and all. He looks confused. "Jack?"

I pick up the toothbrush. "Daniel, what is this?"

Another confused look. "That's your toothbrush, Jack."

"And?" Doesn't he get it?

"And what?"

Guess not.

"You used my toothbrush."

He looks unaffected. "So? I cleaned it off when I was done."

"It's my toothbrush, Daniel. You don't use my toothbrush, Daniel." Another blank look. Do I need to spell it out?

"It's just a toothbrush, Jack."

"My toothbrush."

"And? I wouldn't care if you used mine."

"That's the point, I don't use yours." Does he understand what I'm trying to say here?

"Jeez, Jack, coming from the man who just had his tongue up my ass thirty minutes ago, I'd say you were over-reacting."

"I'm not over-reacting. For crying out loud, it's my toothbrush!" Daniel stops, toothbrush in hand, eyes set like he's thinking about the next words out of his mouth. He doesn't understand. Look at the toothbrush. Don't touch the toothbrush. Then again this is Daniel I'm talking to.

"Do the words 'look, but don't touch' mean anything to you?" It's the same conversation every time. Don't touch the wall. Don't touch the weird alien thing that will surely cause bad things to happen.

Expect now it's my toothbrush.

Daniel is not understanding.

"Jack, it's a toothbrush. You want me to look at a toothbrush?" Okay, perhaps those were the wrong words. Daniel is amused. I can see the laughter behind his eyes. I'm not giving him the satisfaction.

My toothbrush. He needs to learn not to use my toothbrush.

Speaking of which, my linguist is now reaching for the toothpaste. He squirts some on the bristles.

Oh, no he doesn't. Yank.

"Ah." Point the finger in his face. Have to make my point. "Didn't we just talk about this?"

"We didn't talk about anything, Jack. You have a thing about me using your toothbrush."

"I do not have a thing." I swear he's smiling. What the hell is he talking about?

"Oh, you do too have a thing."

"No, I don't."

"Yes, you do."

"No, I don't."

"Yes, you do."

"Thing? Daniel, I do not have a thing." Daniel turns and I hear muffled laughter. What did I say? Oh ... wait a sec ... Who'd have figured Daniel would have such a sick ten year old sense of humor? "Well, I do have a - it doesn't matter! What matters is it's my toothbrush." I hold it up to accentuate my point. It isn't until I feel Crest toothpaste on my palm that I realize I'm holding the toothbrush upside down.

"Um, Jack?"

"Don't say it, Daniel."

"Watch out for the toothpaste."

That does it. This has to end. "I told you not to say it." Daniel looks at me, reaches forward and takes the toothbrush out of my hand. Before I can blink, he rinses it, and loads it with more toothpaste.

Oh, Danny you are not about to go there.

No way.

He's there.

I'm buying a new toothbrush tomorrow.

He pauses, toothbrush still in his mouth and glares at me, those blue eyes daring me to stop him.

Challenging me.

Well, I'm not one to turn down a challenge. And new toothbrush or not, I should still claim my toothbrush and get it back to its rightful owner. I don't leave anyone behind. No causalities.

Even if it is a blue toothbrush currently held hostage by a six-foot, blue-eyed archeologist.

It's still my toothbrush.

With that thought, I step in to claim back what is rightfully mine. In more ways than one. Nose to nose with Daniel, whose hand still grips the end of my toothbrush. My hand reaches up to his -

Suddenly, regaining a toothbrush takes a backseat to another development. Daniel notices as well. Sure sex is great; I want sex. But I have a mission. Toothbrush. And a certain linguist still has possession of that toothbrush. One right move and ....

There we go. Toothbrush has been successfully dropped, rolling down toward the toilet.

Yeah, I am definitely getting a new toothbrush now.

Daniel takes that opportunity to ram full steam ahead, and lets me know he's definitely past our little toothbrush discussion.

I can always get a new toothbrush tomorrow.

I'm being pushed towards the bedroom. God, I love it when Daniel goes all-out alpha male. It happens at the strangest times, I swear, but hell I am not complaining. If a toothbrush does this, I am buying a dozen tomorrow. Daniel can touch them all he wants, as long as there is a new one in the drawer for me to use in the morning.

Daniel tastes of coffee and Crest toothpaste, along with a taste that is purely 'Daniel.' Hands moving ... down and ... oh yeah. Right to the chase. Daniel is not in the mood for foreplay now. And considering I got my way an hour ago, he's determined.

That's just fine with me. I can bottom with the best of 'em. In fact, I like it a little more than I've led Daniel to believe. And Daniel enjoys dominating a little more than he likes me to think.

My little archeologist is all grown up.

Less than thirty seconds later he's showing me just how he's grown. How we've both grown. Thrusts timed to each other. Damn, Danny, I'm trying to hold on, but if you keep going like that ....

Flopping my head back down on the mattress in utter satisfaction, I look up at Daniel, still on top of me. My eyes meet his and he smiles.

"So, can I use your toothbrush now, Jack?" he asks, innocence coloring his tone.

Sex or not, did he just forget our conversation? "Hell no."

Daniel laughs.

Okay, so maybe it was just another normal night.

However, Daniel still needs to learn that one thing.

Don't touch my toothbrush.

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