What
Matters
by Jennamajig
Spoilers: Set early-ish S1, after
Vector. Big spoilers for Uncertainty Principle and a slight
reference to Vector.
Again, thanks to devra for the alpha and support.
Disclaimer: I do not own Numb3rs or anything connected with it.I'm just borrowing and will return all in one piece. Really.
Bang!
Don bolted up in bed, scrubbing at his eyes.
"What the hell?" he muttered and stole a glance at his
digital clock. Three-thirty-seven. Who was making so much noise
at three-thirty in the morning? Outside, he listened to the sound
of rain pelting the streets. It hadn't been raining earlier, he
remembered. What time that had been, he didn't really recall.
Then he heard the knocking. He scrunched his eyes shut and sighed
before forcing himself out of the bed. The floor was cold and
damp beneath his bare feet and he realized he'd left the window
open.
This last case had really taken a lot out of both him and his
team. He was also painfully aware that it had taken a lot out of
Charlie - even though his brother claimed he was fine, Don knew
he was far from it. Denial and hiding were two tactics Don was
familiar with and Charlie often used.
Charlie, who despite his recent consultant work, truly wasn't
used to the everyday dirty work of an FBI agent. Don had learned
long ago when to let go and even now, sometimes knowing didn't
make it any easier.
Therefore he wasn't too surprised at what greeted him when he
stumbled into the living room and peered through the peephole of
his front door.
"Charlie." Sure enough, when he opened his door, there
stood his brother, bike behind him, soaking wet and dripping in
the hallway.
"It's three-thirty in morning," he said.
"I couldn't sleep," Charlie answered, one hand firmly
on the handlebars of his bike. The other one was tucked ever so
slightly behind his back.
"No kidding," Don muttered. "Come in. It's
raining, you know."
"I know." Charlie's tone was quiet, subdued. Abnormal,
a carryover from last night.
All not good.
"I'm sorry I woke you," Charlie started. "Um, but
I...um..."
"It's okay. You know you can come here whenever you need
to." Don reached out to clasp Charlie's shoulder and gently
tugged him and the bicycle inside the apartment. "Geez,
Charlie, you're freezing."
Charlie shrugged. "Got cold outside."
"Yeah." Don didn't like the short sentences. Especially
since short sentences from Charlie were never good. "I'll
get you a change of clothes."
Charlie nodded at him and parked the bike against the wall. Don
disappeared into his bedroom and rummaged through a few drawers.
Anything he had would be a bit too long for Charlie, but he
managed to find something that worked. He grabbed the dry
clothing and went back into the living room. Charlie was still
standing next to his bike.
"Here." Don handed Charlie a shirt. As Charlie shifted
to reach for it with his right hand, his left hand fell to his
side.
That's when Don saw the blood.
Charlie must have noticed because he slid his left hand behind
his back.
"It's nothing, Don. Really. Had a slight accident on the way
here. It was slippery," was Charlie's excuse, but Don wasn't
listening. Instead he walked closer to Charlie and pulled
Charlie's hand out from behind his back and Charlie immediately
hissed.
"Nothing, huh?" There was a deep gash in his palm that
was still bleeding, despite the fact that Charlie appeared to
have tried to stop it somehow. Charlie was wearing a navy hoodie
over a light blue long sleeved shirt, and Don didn't truly how
bad the wound was until he rolled up the hoodie's sleeve and
found the lighter material underneath soaked with blood. Don
almost swore when he saw it and figured Charlie must have used
this shirt's sleeve to slow the bleeding. How the hell had he
gotten here on his bike with this? To make matters worse, the
wound didn't appear very clean; Don gathered that the dirt caked
on Charlie's hand bars hadn't helped.
"This needs stitches."
Charlie tugged his hand away. "No way. I just need a
bandage."
"No, you need a trip to the emergency room. Go get
changed."
"I'm not going to the ER. It's fine," Charlie insisted.
"Right, fine. Show up at my door at three-thirty in the
morning with a deep, bleeding gash in your hand and you're fine.
Charlie, you're dripping blood on my floor. *That's* a good
indication you're not fine. Go get changed, then I'll wrap your
hand."
Charlie shook his head. "No. I told you it's fine. Stop
acting like Dad." To illustrate his point, Charlie took a
step away from Don, but it backfired when he stumbled and his
face paled. Don immediately reached out to steady him.
"Okay, buddy, I think you need to sit down." Don guided
Charlie slowly to the couch. Charlie didn't say a word, just bit
his lip, and let Don led him. Don firmly pushed Charlie down onto
the cushions, not caring how wet his brother was. It was then
that Don noticed that Charlie was shivering slightly.
"You okay?" he asked, knowing Charlie was anything but.
Charlie just blinked at him for a second. "Guess I'm a
little dizzy," he admitted.
Don nodded. "Which is why we're going to the hospital. Do
you need help getting changed?"
"The hospital will take forever," Charlie protested.
"And no, I don't need help."
"Who cares if it takes forever; I don't have anywhere to go.
Do you?" Don offered Charlie a hand up, which Charlie
ignored. "Just why did you come by tonight?"
"I..." Charlie started, "I couldn't sleep."
"I got that much out of you already." Don kept talking,
but started shepherding Charlie towards the bathroom in hopes of
getting his hand wrapped and the two of them on their way to the
hospital.
Charlie swallowed. "It's
nothing."
"Nothing? Charlie, it's late. You're soaked and bleeding in
my living room. It's something. I told you, the outcome of the
case wasn't your fault. Wasn't anyone's fault. We still got the
guy in the end." Don opened his medicine cabinet and
searched for the first aid kit.
"Yeah." Charlie whispered. This was not going to be
easy.
But first things first. Charlie needed medical attention. And dry
clothing. Don found the first aid kit and bandaged Charlie's hand
the best he could before ducking back into the living and
returning with the clothing he'd picked out earlier.
"You need to get changed."
--
Don shifted the clipboard and looked up to see the rain continue
to fall through the emergency room's glass doors. Every time
someone came in, in came the wind and the water, and next to him,
Charlie huddled even more into himself, shivering every so often,
despite the fact that he was now in dry clothing and Don's extra
jacket.
"Charlie, little help here. These forms don't fill out
themselves."
Charlie glared at him, or tried to. With his still pale face and
curls plastered to his forehead from the rain, he looked pitiful
and all of five-years-old. "I can fill them out, you know.
It's my left hand, not my right."
"Not if everyone wants read them," Don countered.
"Besides, your right hand is shaking." He said the last
line casually, but to be honest, that fact was starting to scare
the crap out of him. Don's medical knowledge was limited to basic
first aid and the CPR class he took with the Bureau, but it
didn't take much to recognize the signs of shock. Whether it was
emotional or physical, he wasn't sure, but most likely it was a
bit of both. Charlie hadn't said a word on the ride over, and Don
let him be.
For now, at least.
He watched Charlie's eyes fall to his hand.
"My medical card's in my wallet," Charlie finally
mumbled and started patting his pockets with his injured hand.
"In my pants, which are at..."
"Which are at my place," Don finished. "Good thing
I took it out before we left." He reached into his jacket
packet and pulled out Charlie's battered wallet. "This thing
is falling apart."
"I like it that way," Charlie defended and plucked the
battered leather from Don's hand. He opened it one handed and
unsuccessfully attempted to pull out the insurance card.
"Here." Don lowered the clipboard to his lap and took
the wallet, removed the card, and handed the wallet back to
Charlie.
Charlie stared at it a second. "Thanks."
"No problem."
Don went back to the clipboard, copying down Charlie's insurance
information.
"Don, I'm sorry."
Charlie's voice was so low, and for a moment Don thought he'd
imagined him speaking. In the bustle of the late night - not make
that early morning, Don realized after a glance at clock on the
wall - ER waiting room, he figured he could have, until Charlie
spoke again.
"Sorry I woke you," Charlie said, louder this time. He
shivered and Don hoped they'd call his name soon. With the door
constantly opening, the waiting area wasn't exactly the warmest,
nor the driest spot.
"I told you, anytime." He laid his pen down, the
paperwork finally finished. He got up and handed the paperwork
off to the desk clerk. When he returned to his chair, he found
Charlie staring into space.
"You know, this last case, it was...it was rough."
"Was it?" Charlie asked.
Don was confused. "Six people died, so yeah, I'd say it was
rough."
"People die all the time," Charlie answered. "You
said so. Part of the job."
When had he said that? He couldn't have said that to Charlie. Not
after this - or had he? The last twelve hours were bad and Don
had been hounding Charlie for answer that wasn't there.
"Yes," Don agreed. "People die. And it so happens
that is part of the job. But it's never easy and it's never
okay."
Charlie just blinked at him, and there was the look that Don
hated to see. That 'why, I could have, no, I should have done
something more' face. The one that made Charlie seem even more
naïve and young than he truly was. The same face Charlie had
worn during the Charm School Boys case. Don had been frustrated
then, maybe even mad. Now he was just tired. The FBI had beaten
some hard truths into him, and even though he still considered
himself an optimist, reality always tried its best to get in the
way.
And reality could never be ignored.
Don wondered what he should say, what he could say, but before he
could even open his mouth, a nurse called Charlie's name.
--
"Charlie, the doctor wants to keep you here a few hours. I
think I should call dad."
Charlie shook his head. "No way. You get hurt and the first
sentence out of your mouth is 'not a word to dad'."
"That's different," Don stated.
"How?"
"It just is."
"That's not a reason."
Don ran a hand across his face. There was no way either of them
were hiding this from dad. He'd know something was up when
Charlie strolled through the door in Don's clothes.
"Charlie, you needed ten stitches and your blood pressure
was so low they're giving you IV fluids."
"So? I'll be home by breakfast."
"Breakfast? Try lunch. It's almost seven already."
"Is it?"
"Yes."
"Oh."
Don studied Charlie. Refusing the gown the nurse handed to him
earlier, Charlie laid on the gurney, eyes staring straight up at
the ceiling. An IV ran into his right hand and despite the fact
that it was supposed to be helping Charlie improve, Don swore
Charlie didn't look any better than when they'd first gotten
here. To make matters worse, Charlie had also started running a
slight fever; hence the reason the doctor was a bit reluctant to
sign discharge papers just yet.
At least it was Saturday and a rare day off for Don. Charlie had
no classes to cancel and Don figured the two of them could use a
nap whenever they managed to get out of here.
Charlie still refused to talk. Since his name had been called,
Charlie had clammed up and there was nothing more said about the
recent case. Not that a crowded emergency room was the best place
to tackle such a discussion, but it made the silence that passed
between the two even more pronounced.
"You're not really going to call dad, right?"
Don mulled it over a moment. Chances were that when their father
got up to make breakfast and didn't see Charlie, he'd worry. But
Charlie could have just as easily gotten up and headed over to
campus to work. Don weighed the consequences. Dad might have his
head later, but Don just couldn't ignore the plea in his
brother's voice.
"No. But you can do the explaining when I take you
home."
Charlie closed his eyes, pushing his head even further into the
pillow.
"You okay?" Don asked.
"My hand hurts," Charlie muttered.
"Yeah, I think it would. By the way, how *did* you hurt your
hand, Charlie?"
"I told you, my front tire slipped and the bike toppled.
It's raining."
"The bike toppled? You mean you fell off your bike?"
"No, the bike slipped. I did not fall. And there was a
rock-"
"Rock? That's not what you told the doctor."
"She asked me if there was glass involved, which there
wasn't. And she didn't find anything but dirt in there, so it's
fine. She asked how I did it. I told her I slipped. She didn't
push the subject any further after that."
"You should have called a cab."
"A cab?" Charlie repeated, eyes still closed. "It
was only rain."
"Lots of accidents happen in the rain. You could have been
hit by at car."
"Seventy-percent of bicycle accidents don't involve cars at
all, you know. Statistically there's a much greater chance I
could have hit a pedestrian."
"Well, that makes me feel so much better."
"You sound like Dad again. Don, I'm not five."
"Of course you're not. I'm the first to point that out,
despite that fact that more often than not, you can certainly
behave as one. You could have called me. I would have come over.
Or picked you up."
"At three-thirty in the morning?"
"Yes. I might have been slightly pissed, but you know I
would have come."
Charlie opened his eyes again and lifted his right hand, looking
at the needle embedded there. Don pushed himself out of the chair
next to the gurney and stood over his brother, trying to get him
to make eye contact.
"Charlie. It was a tough case. I understand that you
couldn't sleep. If I hadn't so exhausted, I'd have been restless,
too. But I have a lot more experience with these things."
"So you get used to it?" Charlie asked.
"No," Don answered. "But you learn how to deal
with it. It wasn't your fault. You know that, right?"
Charlie ignored him and stared down at the IV imbedded in his
uninjured hand. "Right?" he repeated.
"If I came up with the answer ten minutes sooner-"
"Six people still would have died," Don finished.
"Even an hour or two wouldn't have made a difference. That
guy was crazy and unpredictable."
Charlie finally turned his eyes towards him. "Nothing's
completely unpredictable."
"I'd think human behavior would be."
Charlie smiled, a ghost of a smile that lasted less than a
second. "That's what Larry keeps telling me."
"And do you listen?"
Charlie didn't answer, just looked down at his hand again.
"Charlie, at Quantico, they touched upon unpredictable
analysis and incomplete profiles. Not every criminal can fit a
perfect mold. That's why they keep coming up with new ones. Terry
throws out psychological profiles at me, but even she was off the
mark here. There's no way we could have known he'd double back at
the last second and change his target. Math can't always predict
human behavior."
"Math can find patterns," Charlie countered.
"Patterns that are made by human behavior."
"And if someone decides to switch up that pattern?"
"You would see the new pattern forming. But..."
"But what?"
"But not without a decent amount of new data."
"Who was it you told me to pay attention to during the Charm
School Boys case? Heisenberg and his Uncertainty Principle."
"An object cannot be observed without changing that which is
being observed. Someone is bound to act differently when they
know they are being watched, even if they try their best not to.
Human behavior is a complicated variable. But Don, there was
just...it was that news broadcast all over again."
Don frowned. "What news broadcast?"
"The one I saw after I was sure I'd given you all the
information you needed to stop the Charm School Boys."
"The shootout," Don stated. "Well, that was
unpredictable, too. We still got the bad guys in the end, though,
thanks to your expertise. You figured out what they were doing
wasn't just robbing banks. Just like you figured out this last
case."
"I should have figured out it faster."
"Charlie, not this again. I have faith in you. Why don't you
have faith in yourself?"
"That's just it."
"That's just it what? I think you lost me here, buddy."
"You have faith in me, which is great. But faith means
pressure and pressure means..." Charlie turned his head away
from Don again.
"Stop that," Don said and moved back into Charlie's
line of vision. He wanted Charlie to look at him. "I don't
mean to put any pressure on you, Charlie. I just know you can do
it. It's not easy admitting that I need my little brother in
order to sometimes do my job, you know. But I guess I do."
"But what happens when I can't give you the answer? When I'm
wrong? I've been wrong. I've even been wrong when you and your
whole office thought I was right."
"You were right in the end."
"In the end, yes. But what happens the day I'm not right in
the end? When something even worse happens because of it?"
Don let out a breath. He'd tried never to think about that. He'd
been frustrated. Frustrated that somewhere in the past few
months, Charlie had become integral to his high arrest and solves
rates. His team was one of the best in the LA office and Don knew
it was partially due to the fact that he had a mathematician at
his fingertips. Since when had he needed that? He'd gotten past
the jealousy and sibling rivalry, but that didn't mean it was
completely forgotten.
It also caused him to stress his brother out. Again, the Charm
School Boys case popped into his brain. It was hard to find
answers when the one person who might be able to help you shuts
down.
But apparently Charlie had learned from that experience. They
both had. There were no outbursts, cluttered chalkboards, or
denials this time. No P versus NP.
This time it was just a late night bike ride in the pouring rain
and a trip to the ER.
"I don't know," Don finally admitted. "But we
haven't gotten there and I try not to think about what would
happen if we did." Don sat down in his chair. "But I
still need your input. You're the one who constantly reminds me
that everything is numbers. So much so, that you even have me
believing it."
"Everything *is* numbers." The statement was followed
by a cough and Charlie tugged the IV line when he tried to muffle
it with his right hand.
Don got back up and laid his hand across Charlie's forehead.
Immediately, Charlie tried to push it away, but hissed when his
injured hand come in contact with Don's hand. "Yeah it is,
including your temperature. Maybe I should go find a nurse."
Don lowered his hand and looked out towards the ER traffic.
Charlie rolled his eyes. "I'm fine. I just want to go
home."
"Yeah, real fine. Use a
different word that actually defines what you're feeling. Dad's
gonna be pissed that I didn't call him."
"He'll get over it. You *are* still not going to call him,
right? I know he worries, but he probably thinks I'm on campus or
something."
Worry was probably an understatement. Their father had most
likely already called Charlie's office and Don knew Alan Eppes
would be waiting by the front door when they finally got in. But
hopefully it wouldn't be much longer. "Provided we get out
of here anytime soon, yes. But your fever's up. I don't know if
they'll like that."
"They can give me Tylenol and I can deal with that at
home."
"Yeah, with Dad."
"Well, he'll bring me soup, at least. And won't stick me
with needles."
"True," Don agreed. Silence fell between for a few
seconds. "You know, Charlie, you're allowed to be
wrong."
"Even when it counts?" Charlie met Don's gaze straight
on and Don knew he was waiting for him to say yes. Was his father
right when he said Charlie valued his opinion? Did he always
expect Charlie to have the answer and would it be okay if he
didn't?
If he didn't, Don would just do his job the best he could. The
same way he'd been doing before Charlie became the go-to-math-guy
for the FBI.
"Yes," Don told him. "But you've never let me down
when it counts. So statistically, well, I think the odds are in
our favor."
Charlie gave him a small smile. "Statistics have nothing to
do with it."
"Oh, they don't, do they? Funny to hear that coming from a
mathematician."
The problem wasn't completely solved or forgotten, but Don hoped
Charlie got the message.
--
Don was right when he'd said their father wouldn't be too happy
with the fact that he hadn't called. When he'd checked his cell
phone in the hospital parking lot, there were three missed calls,
all from dad. When he and Charlie walked in the door, Alan was in
the living room, the phone in his hand, most likely because he'd
been calling around to find Charlie. As predicted, his eyes went
straight to the white bandage wrapped around Charlie's hand.
"What happened? And why didn't you pick up your phone? I was
about to call the police."
Don only looked at Charlie, who told Alan about the accident on
his bike and not being able to sleep.
"It was pouring last night. You shouldn't have gone out
there."
Charlie sighed and gave shot Don a look. "It wasn't pouring
when I left," he defended.
"You could have called."
"I was closer to Don's. And I am a grown-up, Dad."
"Of course you are," Alan agreed. "But sometimes
you forget to act like one. I thought you'd gotten up early and
gone to campus when I didn't see your bike this morning. But when
I called your office you didn't pick up."
Don snorted. "Charlie? Up early on
a Saturday? The only time Charlie's up early on a Saturday is
when he's stayed up the entire night before."
"Hey! I do not sleep that late." Charlie flopped onto
the couch, and tried to stifle a cough with his good hand. In
doing so, his bad hand took a portion of his weight as he settled
and he let out a yelp, which only caused him to cough more.
Alan exchanged a glance with Don and approached his youngest.
"I thought you said you hurt your hand." He reached his
palm out and before Charlie could protest, laid it across his
forehead.
"It's a cold," Charlie stated, not bothering to try and
swat Alan's hand away.
"It's a fever," Alan clarified, "and therefore
more than a cold." He looked at Don. "The hospital let
him go with this?"
"*This* is nothing," Charlie insisted.
"They said to watch it, most likely it's either a virus or
reaction to his hand and the shock."
"Shock?" Alan repeated and turned back to Charlie.
"And was that something you decided to conveniently leave
out of your story?"
"It wasn't important," Charlie answered and slumped
further into the couch, looking more and more like he wanted to
get out of the hole he'd dug himself into.
"If it goes over 102 and stays there, they said we should
call the family doctor," Don pointed out. "It's not
that bad, Dad. He was only running about one-oh-one an hour
ago."
"All right." Alan stopped hovering a moment and the
relief in Charlie's eyes was plain to see. "Though maybe we
should take it again now that you're home."
"Dad..." Charlie started.
"You're sick. Sick people sit still and get their
temperatures taken."
"Dad, Don just told you that they took it at the hospital an
hour ago."
"So? Humor your father. I'll be right back."
Alan disappeared up the stairs.
Charlie glared at Don. "You had to give him details, didn't
you?"
Don shrugged and sat down next to his brother on the couch.
"You had to fall off your bike in the rain and wake me up at
three-thirty in the morning."
"I could tell him about kitchen window."
"The one I broke when I was twelve? Go ahead. What's he
going to do? Ground me? I don't even live here."
"For someone that doesn't live at home anymore, you
certainty spend enough time here. And what happened to the
kitchen window?" Alan stood a few feet away. Don hadn't even
heard him come back down the stairs. How did he do that?
Sometimes parents were downright scary and Don wondered if he'd
inherit any of those traits if he ever had kids. And his father
stressed the "if" often.
"Nothing happened to window," Don commented innocently.
"Yeah, nothing but Don's baseball."
"Charlie." Don nudged Charlie in the ribs. Charlie only
grinned and started coughing again.
"That's enough." Alan handed Don the aural thermometer.
"Donnie, stick this in his ear. Your mother told me she
broke that window."
"Mom lied," Charlie quipped and Don took the
opportunity to put the tip of the thermometer less than gently
into Charlie's left ear. "Ow! Watch it."
"Sorry," Don muttered. "Mom and I made a deal,
Dad. And that was over twenty years ago. Charlie was like six. I
can't believe you even remember this."
"It was the window over the sink. There was glass inside the
garbage disposal," Alan said. "You mother was still
trying to get it out when I came home. Why did she....never mind.
Some things, perhaps, were better kept between you and your
mother."
The thermometer beeped and Don pulled it from Charlie's ear.
Charlie sighed dramatically. "Well?"
"101.3," Don responded. "Pretty much the same it
was at the hospital."
"Like I said before." Charlie turned his injured hand
over, studying the bandage.
"Don't touch it. It'll never heal," Alan reprimanded.
Charlie looked puzzled. "I hadn't even..."
"You were thinking about it."
"No I wasn't." He looked at Don. "Tell him I
wasn't."
"I..." Don held up his hands. "You're on your own.
I plead the Fifth."
"What happened to faith?" Charlie asked.
"It's still there," Don insisted. "But you told
Dad about the window."
"The window doesn't matter," Alan put in.
"You," he nodded at Charlie, "should be in
bed."
"I'm not tired," Charlie insisted. "The couch is
fine." He shifted and accidentally put pressure on his
injured palm. He sucked in a
breath.
Alan raised an eyebrow at Don. "They send you home with any
pain medicine?"
Don reached into his pocket and pulled out a bottle of pills and
a couple of slips of paper. "A few. A prescription in case
he needs anymore. Another prescription for antibiotics. I haven't
stopped by the pharmacy to fill it yet."
Alan took the slips from Don's hand. "I can do that. I need
to run past the grocery store anyway. We don't have any
soup."
Charlie groaned. "I don't need soup."
"You're sick. Of course you need soup." The way Alan
said it, Don knew there was no if, ands, or buts, in his
statement.
"No carrots," Charlie muttered. "I hate-"
"Carrots," Alan finished. "I'm your father. I
don't think I would forget such a thing."
--
"I got your pillow from upstairs."
Don put the pillow on the end of the couch and told another good
look at his brother. Charlie was sitting up, but just barely. He
was leaning so deeply against the couch cushions that he'd
probably fall over if Don yanked one from under him. Charlie's
eyes were at half-mast and he was staring into space. The TV was
on, but Don knew Charlie wasn't paying any attention to it. A
bowl of soup sat a couple of feet away on the side table, and
looked untouched.
Oh well, Don figured. Dad had tried. And would try again later,
no doubt. Don had thought Charlie looked bad at the hospital, but
honestly, he didn't look much better at home. The paleness was a
bit better, but in its place was a fever flush across both of
Charlie's cheeks. A stack of papers sat on the couch next to him,
a pencil lying on top of them, as if Charlie had been working,
but decided to abandon the project. As Don, shifted the paper and
sat down on the couch Charlie absently raised his hand to stifle
another
cough.
"Thanks," he told Don.
"How you doing?" Don asked. "Because you don't
look that hot. You sure you were feeling okay before last
night?"
Charlie gave a little shrug. "It's that time of year. All my
students are coughing and sneezing during classes. Maybe I picked
something up."
"Maybe you need to get more sleep."
"You should talk." Charlie started to inch towards his
pillow, putting an elbow on it. He yawned.
"You should take a nap."
Charlie shook his head. "It's those pain meds you and Dad
made me take. By the way, it's so not fair when you gang up on
me."
"Who says I have to play fair?" Don teased.
"Seriously, Charlie, you all right?"
"Seriously?" Charlie asked. "I feel like crap. My
hand hurts, I'm cold, and Dad's soup is making me nauseous. Plus
I promised Larry I'd work on some calculations..." He looked
towards the paper Don had moved. "The numbers aren't making
a lot of sense to me right now. That can't be good, right?"
Don glanced at the items he had moved, seeing Charlie's
handwriting across the pages, strings of numbers he had no clue
about. "I thought you and Larry had finished these. Before
the case, I mean. You mentioned that at dinner last week."
"You can always spot the flaws more accurately when you
recheck your work after letting it sit a few days. There are some
errors and I'm not exactly sure why."
"You'll figure it out."
"Yeah," Charlie muttered and lapsed into silence a
moment. The sounds of CNN filtered in and Don heard them briefly
mention, yet again, the events of almost two days ago.
"Don?"
Charlie's voice was so soft that Don almost didn't hear it.
"Yeah?"
"Did you really mean what you said? Before, at the
hospital?"
"We did a lot of talking at the hospital, Charlie. You might
have to be more specific."
"About it being all right if I was ever wrong. That it could
be okay if one day I can't come up with the answer for the FBI.
For you."
"Oh," Don answered. "Well, I said it was, so of
course I meant it."
Charlie shook his head and opened his mouth to respond, but
coughed instead. "No," he managed. "You say you
meant it, but you really think it'll never happen."
"I said I have faith in you." Don was a little
confused. "Charlie, I'm not lying here."
"I know you're not," Charlie responded. "But how
you can say it will be okay when you are not factoring in the
fact that it could happen? The equation, your thinking, is
incomplete without that variable."
"Are you saying I'm too optimistic? Now that's something I
don't hear every day. I'll have to share that with Terry."
Don tried to lighten the mood, grinning a little, but Charlie
wasn't buying it. "Charlie, I value you opinion or I
wouldn't ask for it. And believe me, I don't always want to ask
for it. But it works. I see it, the NSA sees it. Which, by the
way-"
"I can't tell you. Don't even try," Charlie finished.
"I'll find out. You have to crack."
"No way. I'm better at keeping a secret than you give me
credit for. I didn't say anything about the window."
"Until today," Don pointed out. "Charlie, numbers
are your life. Catching criminal suspects is mine. If anyone had
told me that when I joined the FBI the two could work in hand in
hand, I wouldn't have listened. Nor would I have believed. I
believe now."
"You would have been wrong. You were wrong. Math does a lot
more than crack a few bank cases."
"So I've seen. Charlie, if you're wrong. You're wrong. You
can make a mistake. You've almost made some. I've made some. You
just try and learn from them. Which I'd think a college professor
would know. Preach even. I'm sure Larry does."
"I don't normally deal with human life in the
classroom," Charlie replied. "But yeah, mistakes can
always be an educational tool. But can you make mistakes in the
FBI? It's not a classroom."
Don shrugged. "Agents do. Whether you can or not, it
happens. You just try your best to make sure it doesn't. You hope
your victim, your witness, stays alive, but you're never
surprised when they don't. But you can't give up, even when the
worst-case scenario starts to come true. Do you give up when you
can't solve a math problem?"
Charlie shook his head. "No. I'm stubborn."
"I guess I am too. Part of the Eppes' charm." Don
paused a moment. "Charlie, this case was...bad. Plain and
simple. Everything an agent hopes won't happen, happened. When it
was done, I spent hours at the office going over every move,
every strategy. Looking to see what went wrong."
"Did you find anything?" Charlie looked as if he
expected Don to say "yes." To say something went wrong.
Don shook his head. "No one did anything wrong. We couldn't
have known."
"Six people are still dead."
"They are," Don admitted. "But it could have been
worse."
"Could it?"
Don let out a breath. Cases like this were never easy, but the
fact that this wasn't the worse thing he'd ever seen was far from
comforting. "Yeah, it could have been. But he won't hurt
anyone else. That's what matters. It's over."
"It is." Charlie yawned again and was starting to lean
move heavily into his pillow. Don knew it was only a matter a
minutes before Charlie crashed.
"Get some sleep," he told Charlie.
"Not sleepy," Charlie muttered, but settled his head
against the pillow anyway.
Don grinned and got up to find a blanket. When he found one and
returned back to the couch, Charlie was out like a light, hair
astray, fever-flushed, and peaceful. He coughed again in his
sleep, and Don hoped whatever antibiotics Charlie was on for the
hand also took care of this little bug before it got serious.
He laid the blanket over Charlie's shoulders.
It was over, all right. But Don knew it might not be the last
horrible case Charlie ever worked. No matter what, he couldn't
protect Charlie from everything.
Especially himself.
--
Epilogue - Two days later
Don stopped in the doorway to Charlie's room, folder dangling
from his fingertips and leaned his body against the door jam.
Charlie didn't notice him, or if he did, didn't acknowledge his
presence.
His brother was sitting on top of his bed. The covers were pushed
all the way to the edge and sheets of papers covered the exposed
sheet. Charlie had a pencil in his teeth and was shifting the
pages in front of him. A new bandage covered his left hand, Don
noted. He pulled the pencil out of his mouth to cough, a deep
cough, that to Don didn't sound any better then it had this
morning when Don stopped by for breakfast before heading to the
office.
"Being in bed usually means being under the covers."
"I was too hot," Charlie explained, not even bothering
to look up.
Don noted the still flushed cheeks. "Uh huh. Fever will do
that. What did the doctor say?"
"What makes you think I went to the doctor?" Charlie
started scribbling with his pencil.
Don yanked the pencil from Charlie's hands. Charlie let out a
protest. "Last night your fever was 102.5. Plus, I talked to
Dad after he made the appointment this morning. So, what did the
doctor say?"
"What, you didn't talk to Dad *after* my appointment?"
"Of course I did, but I wanted to hear it from you."
Charlie sighed. "Bronchitis. No class for a week. Different
antibiotics. Some inhaler thing. Hey, what's that in your
hand?"
"It's a case," Don answered. "But you still sound
pretty rough, buddy. Maybe I should come back later." Don
smiled, letting Charlie know he was teasing.
Charlie rolled his eyes. "Don, it's bronchitis. I feel a lot
better, really. Antibiotics work wonders. What's the case?"
"Bank fraud."
"Again?"
"It's popular. Not everything case I get involves high
profile murders, you know." Don handed the folder to
Charlie.
"I never said it did." Charlie flipped the folder open
and scanned the pages. "A bank fraud case sounds good right
now. A piece of cake, really."
"Got an answer already?"
Charlie shook his head and smiled. "No, but I won't give up
till I do."
Don grinned right back. "Good. I wouldn't have it any other
way."